Fathers & Families Supports Wife Beaters!

In this article Glenn Sacks, the executive director of Fathers & Families is quoted “To be clear, he says, "Not now or ever do we believe that wife beaters should be getting control of their children."

Guess What… HE LIED!.

My father was found in the Minneapolis Family Court and by the Minnesota court of appeals to have abused my mother.

Yet Fathers & Families publically supports this wife beater!

San Francisco Weekly Supports Child Survivors

http://www.sfweekly.com/2011-03-02/news/family-court-parental-alienation-syndrome-richard-gardner-pedophilia-domestic-violence-child-abuse-judges-divorce/

Finally a reporter who dares to expose Family Courts Helping Pedophiles & Batterers Get Child Custody.

Dear Mr. Jamison,

My name is Jennifer Collins. My brothers and I escaped the American family court crisis by fleeing to Europe with our mother in 1994. We have been living in exile for almost 17 years. My little brother is just about to turn 18 years old this month and we are making preparations to return home to the United States.

My father severely abused me, my brother and even our mother in our presence. We’re not just talking about harsh words or a few slaps here and there. There were numerous broken bones to our mother, concussions, dislocated shoulder, knife wounds, burn wounds, etc… Our father even testified under oath that he “hit” and “punched” our mother and “broke her nose” on two separate occasions. He testified in court that he “dislocated her shoulder” while my brother and I watched in horror. He also admitted under oath that several times he threatened to “kill” me and my brother. Our father fractured my brother’s skull by repeatedly slamming him into the stairway walls. Our mother was only 22 years old when child protection threatened her with “Failure to Protect” if she didn’t leave our father and take us with her. However my father filed for custody in family court citing “Parental Alienation.” Despite all the evidence; medical records, child protection reports, police statements, witness affidavits, testimony of our pediatrician and our own testimony that our father was hurting us, the judge reversed custody. It was the worst day of my life.

Without warning we were ripped out of the safety of our mother’s arms and given to the very man who beat us and threatened to kill us and our mother. We were denied all contact with our mother in order for them to try to “severe the close bond with the mother.” That in itself was devastating. Eventually we had a few hours a week supervised visitation with our mom. During those visits we begged our mom to help us and protect us. I lifted my shirt to reveal bruises and welts on my back and bottom. I told my mother and the supervisors that my father and his girlfriend were “still hurting us!” I was scolded by the court supervisors: “You know you are not allowed to talk about those kinds of things anymore.” After 18 months and 8 days of torture, including our father suffocating us with pillows when we cried until we lost consciousness, we ran away. We ran to our mother and together we fled the United States of America.

Even though we didn’t have passports we found a way out of the United States and made our way to Europe. Our mother sought protection for her children and requested amnesty in the Netherlands. After 3 long years in various refugee camps and intense investigations form the Dutch Ministries we were awarded asylum. As far as we know we are the first Americans to ever be granted asylum in another country.

We hid in the Netherlands for 14 years and did not have contact with family or friends during that time in fear that our father would find us and kill us and/or our mother. In 2007 we were found by the FBI. After a lengthy investigation from the FBI and again by the Dutch Ministries our asylum was upheld and all national and International Kidnapping/parental abduction charges against our mother were dismissed.

Now our abusive father has allied himself with the Father’s and Families Organization and Glenn Sacks has launched a personal attack against us and our mother. Glenn Sacks admitted to asking thousands of the Fathers & Families followers to “investigate” our mother. Now he is calling for them to come forward and bombard your newspaper with thousands of letters hoping to intimidate your publisher to retract your story. This is a standard tactic of these bullies and abusers. I hope you won’t be intimidated.

There are various battered mothers organizations out there as well as this very powerful father’s rights organization. I am in the process of gathering hundreds and hundreds of kids together to form our own organization and to tell the truth about what is really happening to us in the family courts.

Will you please listen to us?

Sincerely,
Jennifer Collins
Executive Director
Courageous Kids Network.

You Are Not Alone - Courageous Kids Network

COURAGEOUS KIDS NETWORK
http://www.courageouskids.net/

Minneapolis Supervisor James E. Seas is Exposed for Conspiring to Conceal Child Abuse to the Collins Children

Well I found the visitation supervisor from Minneapolis who lied to the court when I was young and conspired to conceal the abuse to me and my brother. Once we indentified his name it was easy to track him down. He is a known troublemaker, calling the police several times in the same day just to complain.

Over the last 2 years James E. Seas aka JES also violated client patient confidentiality and made (FALSE) statements to the media.

This is the same guy who also made libelous comments on various web sites!

We tracked him down and I gave him the opportunity to explain his side of the story to me (email below.) Of course he didn’t respond.

Now it is up to the attorneys to hold him accountable. I found the witnesses and I have the evidence. We are coming after you now Mr. Seas!


Dear Mr. Seas,

Well I finally found you.

Do you remember me? My name is Jennifer Collins. You were the visitation supervisor at Katahdin when I was a little girl.

I am trying to put the puzzle pieces together of how my father got away with abusing me and my brother for so many years.

You say that you really care about kids and you are willing to help me find the truth! I hope you mean that. I would like to understand how everything happened the way it did.

Will you please explain your position? This is not intended for public use. I just want answers to my past so I can process a most painful childhood.

Sincerely,
Jennifer Collins

* Please note that even though I found out the names of his children I did not post them as he did of my younger brother.

Glenn Sacks Director of Fathers & Families Continue to Bully Battered Women

Glenn Sacks likes to attack already vulnerable battered women like Holly Collins. Shame on Sacks!

Ah... Disgruntled Sacks is Back!

The 8th annual Battered Mothers Custody Conference was held in Albany New York on January 7-9 2011. It was most powerful and the overwhelming consensus is that Change is Imminent! This revives some hope in battered women and abused children all over the United States who have been inadequately protected from known abusers.

However the father’s rights guys or more accurately, the Father Supremacists aka the abuser supporters, were in a frenzy trying to discredit and detract from the public uprising of united citizens standing up against child abuse in the family court system. It is pathetic that these Father Supremacists forced their way into a New York hotel where vulnerable battered women were staying for the conference. They cornered, scared and re-traumatized women in the hallways and their hotel rooms, sending them terrified, crying and running for help.

My 27 year-old brother, who agreed to speak out just this once about our case to put his point of view on the record actually came to their rescue. He is a ‘normal’ guy who doesn’t understand the ins and outs of the father’s rights issues. He told me “This is bullshit! Normal fathers don’t act like this!” The problem is that the fathers rights groups are deceptive and try to stir up support from all American men claiming that they are nobly pursuing what is right and just for all fathers, but how is terrorizing domestic violence survivors who are gathering peacefully for inspiration and healing a noble pursuit?

I am all for the rights of ALL fathers and mothers who do NOT abuse their children. Children deserve to have GOOD fathers in their lives! They deserve to have GOOD mothers in their lives! But the rights of abusive fathers (and mothers) should NEVER be put above children's’ right to be SAFE and taken care of!

I find it humorous that the Fathers and Families site published an article the very next day on January 10th 2011. In big letters Glenn Sacks writes that “Misguided DV Groups Back Discredited Battered Mothers Custody Conference” Don't you find it a little funny, if not insolent, that the "almighty Glenn Sacks" personally concludes that "I say therefore it is"? HE writes that the BMCC is "discredited" but who exactly is discrediting this national conference where all of our nation's best domestic violence experts are gathering freely on their own dime to donate an entire weekend of their time during the middle of winter in Albany, NY? To me that sounds like committed individuals and professionals who believe in the work they do!

Glenn Sacks claims that Barry “Nolan read Holly’s description of her case and also does so in the film. He is apparently unaware of much of the facts and history of the case.” I wrote to Barry Nolan to ask him his opinion of Glenn Sacks' accusations. Mr. Nolan responded that he will be personally addressing Glenn Sacks' false allegations against him and his wife Garland Waller.

Glenn Sacks also criticized my mother's attorney, Alan Rosenfeld: “In his speech at the BMCC he says he took the case pro bono after many in the domestic violence establishment urged him to. Like Nolan, he is apparently unaware of much of the facts and history of the case.” C'mon everybody – Do you really think that Glenn Sacks is going to know more about the facts of our case then our own attorney whose been given access to EVERYTHING?

Again, I asked Attorney Rosenfeld to comment and he replied "I am proud that I helped ensure that Holly wasn't punished at all for her alleged kidnapping. Specifically those charges were dismissed."

I also went through my old e-mails and I came across a mail from Attorney Rosenfeld when Glen Sacks attacked my mom in the past. On October 8th 2008 Attorney Rosenfeld responded "if Holly and Jennifer want me to I would be willing to dare Sacks to get the players from Minnesota who claim to him that Holly and her children were not abused, to waive their various immunities and statutory defenses and have the truth about the claims of abuse be determined in a court of law. Presumably there would be none of them that would step forward to take that dare.” I can tell you right now YES! This is something that my mom, my brother and I want. So come on Mr. Sacks produce your witnesses!

Now Glenn Sacks is claiming to know firsthand what happened during the interviews he was not present for and is writing as if it were fact! “the case’s custody evaluators noted “in response to routine questions about custodial plans, Holly stated ‘I’ll make the biggest media circus out of this if I have to. I’ll do whatever it takes if Mark gets custody.’”

How can anyone call anything a “routine custody evaluation” when there is abuse and custody evaluators are threatening to give custody to the ABUSER? REMEMBER… the judge found that my father Mark Collins was an abuser!

Sacks then wines that “Holly Collins’ claims about her high-profile custody case are disputed by her own mother, grandmother, sister, brother, former in-laws, her ex-husband and his wife, numerous doctors, Guardians ad Litem, social workers, mental health professionals and all seven judges who have heard this case.”

What Mr. Sacks conveniently fails to mention is:

1.) That I provided copies of correspondence my mother had with my grandmother in which my grandmother admitted to physical abuse in our family.

"Dear Holly ... I view life very differently from you. For example, when I was young, my mother worked at night and I stayed alone when I came home from school. My mother punished us by hitting us with my father's razor strap... and when she hit us kids, we had black and blue bruises for a month… But my mother did the best she could under those circumstances... at that time. My mother never said she was sorry, nor have I ever asked her to say she was sorry... Hopefully, you can understand that Gram did the best that she could do in raising me... I did the best that I could do in raising you... and you will do the best that you can for your own children. None of us will even be close to perfection! ... Love Mom" (Email from Eleanor Gallagher dated February 2009)

2.) My mother’s sister came forward and issued a statement that she was also abused. Then my mother’s mother (Eleanor Gallagher) wrote an email threatening my mother’s siblings:

“Attached (just click on the attachment above) are the orders from the MN Court finding Holly in contempt for violating the orders issued by Judge Porter. It appears that Holly maybe in a lot trouble for not abiding by the orders… This is just a reminder that in your case... all the records have been sealed and the Court Ordered states: " That there be not reproduction of or reference to any materials contained within the records on file with the Court in this matter or with the aforesaid agencies/persons, his/her agent, or any agency absent a Court Order to the contrary." …if you, or Michael... or your father, or Holly Collins, violate the court order cited above, I will bring the matter before the court and request charges of Contempt of Court be brought against anyone who violates the order. Have a good day! Love, Mom” (eliegallagher Tuesday, January 27 2009 9:11AM Subject: Holly found in Contempt of Court)

Oh my Goodness... this is too funny! My grandmother threatens her own children with lawsuits and ends the threat with "Have a good day! Love Mom." Why do you think the Gallaghers are so afraid for the court records from my mother and her siblings’ childhood to be released? Doesn’t it also appear to you that they are trying to conceal child abuse? Oh and by the way… my mother’s brother’s name is Michael! He is also forbidden by the Gallagher’s to come forward about the abuse.

3.) My own father testified that he broke my mother’s nose several times and dislocated our mothers shoulder in front of us.

“The two broken noses occurred when we were first married in my parents’ house" It is almost humorous that my father describes how it happens: "I rolled over asleep in bed.” (File No. DA157327 court transcript 06/07/1989 pg 5)

"Her shoulder was dislocated just fooling around. I don’t know how to explain this. We were wrestling.” ( File NO. DA171721 court transcript 01/08/1991pg26)

Attorney: "The dislocated shoulder was a wrestling episode? Was anybody else present during that, do you remember?"

Mark Collins: "Just the children." ( File NO. DA171721 court transcript 01/08/1991 pg 36)

Look at this! My father admitted to dislocating his wife’s shoulder in front of his own children! Can anyone imagine how terrifying this was on two young children to witness their father hurting their mother like that, to hear her screams of pain? Witnessing our father abusing our mother was extremely traumatizing!

Okay so my father’s parents don’t want to believe that their son is an abuser! But they weren’t in the room were they? Their own son testified that they weren't there! Let's think about that last one for a moment: What mother wants to believe she raised a monster? I can't help but wonder if Sacks' own 82 year-old mother struggles with those same feelings of guilt; does she read her son's webpage where he disparages women and exalts men who do the same? What mother would be proud of her son for dispatching his agents to a battered mothers conference to further terrorize the participants who have gathered there and then report about it as if he's accomplished something grand? Does Sacks feel that being the bully on the playground is rewarding and feels oh so good?

The rest of this comment by Glenn Sacks is proven falsehoods! Glenn Sacks claims that numerous doctors disputed my mother’s claims of abuse. That is such a lie! How can he unabashedly invent and perpetuate these lies? The social workers and mental health professionals supported my mother and not my father at all, but Sacks gets away with telling such lies because ABUSERS are used to not being challenged. Challenge an abuser and you won't get a respectful debate - you'll incur their wrath and vile, condescending words for daring to contradict or defy them!

Glenn Sacks states “Hennepin County Family Court services found that Holly Collins suffers from multiple mental disorders, including Munchausen’s Syndrome by Proxy (MSbP)” This is EXACTLY my point all along! - A Hennepin County Family Court Services evaluator thought that our case had similar characteristics to 6 (six) articles that she read! Six articles! NOT ONE psychologist, psychiatrist or doctor ever said that my mother suffered from any mental illness and certainly NOT MSbP, which although a rare mental health disorder, is curiously over-diagnosed in all too many domestic violence survivor cases. In fact, the very experts in MSbP all vehemently denied that this was a MSbP case!

Glenn Sacks lies again stating that “The Court of Appeals noted that 'the children have adjusted well to the new custody arrangement' in Mark Collins’ care and that 'the children’s health has improved. The court said that Holly Collins’ accusations that Mark Collins and his current wife were abusing the children were 'found to be without substance,' and that the lower court’s finding that Holly Collins’ care 'endangered [the children's] physical and emotional health' was 'supported by evidence in the record'.”

The court of appeals never investigated the facts! They just checked to see if procedure was followed - that's all folks! Look very closely at Glenn Sacks sentences - he keeps inserting half-phrases of sentences and distorts their whole meaning.

Sacks boasts that “Inside Edition was scheduled to air a report on the Holly Collins case on 11/12/08 but decided not to, apparently due to their doubts about Collins' credibility.” In truth Glenn Sacks has no idea why the story didn’t air! The producer assured us that it wasn’t about our credibility at all! Isn't it interesting to find that Sacks first boasted that it was the father and families success in bombarding a studio with threats that made them successful in keeping the story off the air? Now he claims something different. What was the real reason Mr. Sacks? (And not to belabor a point, but do peaceful men and good fathers resort to bombarding and threatening to get their way?)

Glenn Sacks writes “In January of 2009, Fathers and Families released an exhaustive, 11,000 word analyses of the court records and documents in the case.” This is so stupid! This is his own article that he (Glenn Sacks) concocted himself! He got a fathers’ rights group to publish it without any research of their own into our case! Moreover, what NORMAL person would know that there are 11,000 words contained in an analysis? Sounds like someone doesn't have anything better to do with their time... If we count up the numbers of words in my 5 part investigation of Glenn Sacks I bet it would have a double word count to Sacks article. Does that mean that I can then claim to be the EXPERT on how disturbed Glenn Sacks is?

Glenn Sacks writes that his “analysis, which can be seen here exposed the Holly Collins case as a complete fabrication.” I still marvel that a man with absolutely NO ACCESS to any of the relevant, CONFIDENTIAL documents can boast such preposterous claims! Worse is that some people actually believe the stuff that he spews!

I found it most interesting that Glenn Sacks writes “In our Report we…” Really? I didn't see any co-author credits to his verbal diarrhea (but then again, abusers HATE sharing the spotlight...) This is Glenn Sacks' report yet he makes it look like Fathers & Families is also a party to this defamation of character. Again - typical of abusive behavior: abusers like to stir up trouble and be at the center of the drama so long as they're not caught and held personally accountable for their words and actions...

And then my personal favorite: Glenn Sacks keeps blaming my mother for my posts! Again… this is MY website, Mr. Sacks. Why do you insist and persist in chasing after traumatized and battered women? Shame on you!

Sacks states that my mother made “Extensive, utterly fictitious personal attacks on Fathers and Families Executive Director Glenn Sacks, including attacks on Sacks’ 82-year-old mother.” To be explicitly clear so there can be no misinterpretation, my mother did not write about Glenn Sacks and his mother. I DID! What I wondered aloud about and asked was “Was little Glenn abused by his own mother when he was a child or is he angry with her for not protecting him against an abusive father?” In absence of information the only thing I can do is wonder and ask, yet Mr. Sacks interprets this as an "attack" - as a psychology major, this is all just simply FASCINATING stuff...

Glenn Sacks states that during my mother’s presentation at the BMCC she “referenced Fathers & Families and said 'On their website they posted that I should be gang-raped as an appropriate punishment.' This is false—nobody associated with Fathers and Families has ever or would ever say such a thing or anything close to it.” Here he goes again - it's always GOT to be about Glenn Sacks... even when he is wrong!

If you click on the link http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/11888924 and go directly to 51 minutes and 20 seconds, you can hear for yourself that my mother did NOT say a thing about Glenn Sacks or the Fathers & Families Organization! She specifically says “Humiliating details of abuse to me and my children have been splattered all over the news by SOME fathers’ rights organizations” There are so many different fathers’ rights organizations out there. Why does Glenn Sacks automatically think that he holds the monopoly on them all?

I remember vividly when Glenn Sacks personally posted this and other violent comments from one of his followers. I was so upset when I first read that a father’s rights organization was promoting gang rape! Again… Normal fathers’ would NEVER do this! I contacted several reputable professionals and directed them to the exact link.

From my e-mail from February 2009
“there are several fathers’ rights activists who are furious that our case has challenged their cause and that I am demanding that children come first, before mothers and before fathers! These organizations are known for supporting batterers and child molesters openly. A popular fathers’ rights advocate, Glenn Sacks has launched a full fledged personal attack against our family. He has recently printed a lengthy article full of half truths and outright lies. I am trying to find out if he can also be held accountable for his blatantly false, slanderous public statements. Now his followers are threatening that I should be “deprogrammed” and my mother “gang raped” as a punishment for denying my father his rights to his children. It is disgusting and terribly frightening."

Glenn Sacks received so much condemnation that he finally removed the violent postings. At the very top of Glenn Sacks latest attack he writes “Fathers and Families Executive Director Glenn Sacks.” Sacks links himself to Fathers & Families by claiming to be the executive director therefore providing the connection as I cited. Thanks Glenn for clearing that up for us.

And again… my brother's fractured skull apparently still confounds Glenn Sacks who keeps searching for an alternative reason for why my father fractured my brother’s skull. Despite the medical records that I supplied to Mr. Sacks myself, here is what he continues to claim:

"At the BMCC, Holly Collins claimed that Zachary got a skull fracture while trying to protect her from Mark Collins’ attacks. Actually, the injury occurred when Zachary fell forward on a ride in an amusement park–Holly Collins sued the amusement park for the injury and obtained a large financial settlement.”

There were no broken bones at the amusement park ride in 1987; an X-ray confirmed “No broken bones!” yet Glenn Sacks, who wasn't there, just makes this stuff up as he goes along - just like my abusive father! Hey - wait a minute! If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck what do ya’ think it is...???

Glenn Sacks then goes on to try to portray Jeff Imm as a victim of alienation when in fact my mother and brother have begged Jeff to come visit him. This is the same baby that Jeff Imm claims isn’t his child. How can Fathers & Families have it both ways? If a man denies he's the father and doesn’t want anything to do with his child, how can he claim alienation? Actually, this classic problem - a father denying paternity and not wanting anything to do with his child - is how and why so many father-friendly programs and initiatives came about to begin with. But, like the folks who infiltrated the Battered Mothers Custody Conference the Father Supremacists similarly infiltrated, corrupted and exploited the good cause of keeping good fathers connected to their children - so actually Glenn Sacks and his followers are making the very problem they claim to want to resolve even worse by their "activism" in trying to help. Fascinating the extents that Mr. Sacks will go to deem himself the "King of Everything".

My father’s abuse to my mother, my brother and me was extensive. There are numerous incidents that the almighty Sacks has not heard about yet. For example my father killing my unborn sibling is not a new tale as Sacks now claims. It was documented years ago. My mother finally has the courage to stand up to all the horrid abuse from my father. Of course Glenn Sacks likes to find the most painful ways possible to hurt already battered and abused women.

When my mother first read Glenn Sacks' article, she was saddened that he was still full of lies and half-truths, but I am not surprised. I'm actually wondering what took him so long? I wrote several detailed articles about Glenn Sacks' (lack of) character last year: Did you notice that he never responded? But… he has the nerve to go after a battered woman who merely tells what happened to her.

Here are the links again for those of you who want confirmation to what a creep this guy is (just in case there's someone with any doubts...)

The REAL Glenn Sacks - College student, Jennifer Collins investigates the unethical columnist who has been virtually stalking her and her family. (Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, content & conclusion)

http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/02/real-glenn-sacks.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/02/college-student-jennifer-collins.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/02/real-glenn-sacks-iii-by-jennifer.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/02/real-glenn-sacks-part-iv-child-abuse.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/02/this-is-real-glenn-sacks-part-iv-by.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/03/directory-of-jennifer-collins-5-part.html
http://americanchildrenunderground.blogspot.com/2010/03/conclusion-of-real-glenn-sacks.html

Glenn Sacks never even addressed any of these issues! I guess there's just no disputing the truth...

Glenn Sacks goes about attacking professional after professional: doctors, lawyers, advocates, psychologists, etc, etc… As far as I remember this is an abusive lazy loser who stays at home and milks off his hard-working wife! Must be nice to recline and pass judgment upon others...

Like he does again: "A professor, film producer, and promoter of the Holly Collins hoax in her upcoming film No Way Out But One. At the conference, Waller held a screening and discussion of what she describes as an 'An Independent Documentary on Holly Collins - The First Woman to Be Granted Political Asylum on Grounds of Domestic Violence'. Waller’s contention that Collins was 'Granted Political Asylum on Grounds of Domestic Violence' is false. Collins was not granted political asylum—she lost her asylum case, but won a subsidiary suit asking she be allowed to remain in Holland anyway on humanitarian grounds. In other words, her asylum attempt failed, but the Dutch government was unable to deport her for medical reasons, among others. Collins soon had four children in four years with a Dutch man who worked at the camp for illegal immigrants where she was being held–once Dutch children were involved; there was little chance of Collins being deported."

So Sacks claims that my mother won asylum for having 4 children in 4 years by a Dutch man. Funny how he calculates this considering my little brothers and sisters were born AFTER my mother received asylum!!! But he goes on:

"While Collins was in Holland, anti-immigration sentiment led to many changes in the law, starting in 2001. One of these changes was that they erased some of the distinctions between the different classes of immigrants, so Collins’ green card does read “Asiel” (Asylum). This is rich! Glenn Sacks claims to know more about asylum in the Netherlands then the Dutch Asylum attorneys. His self importance never ceases to amaze me. By the way… if Glenn Sacks would have done any proper research at all he would have discovered that the Dutch residency permits are RED and NOT Green!

And… Sacks continues to babble: “Holly Collins and (apparently) Waller promote the view that American authorities tried to extradite Collins to the US based on pressure from Mark Collins but that Dutch authorities found that Holly had been a battered wife and, in Holly’s words, “Netherlands, a tiny little country–stood up to the United States of America” to prevent her extradition. In reality, American officials did not try to have Collins extradited: few if any officials were even aware that she was in Holland.” C’mon Sacks no one believes you that the American authorities did not know that we were in the Netherlands. There were many highly publicized articles including “Battered Woman Becomes American Refugee in Amsterdam” splattered all over the front pages of the Minneapolis City Pages on July 30, 2008!http://www.citypages.com/2008-07-30/news/battered-woman-becomes-american-refugee-in-amsterdam/Just because Glenn Sacks didn’t know about our case it doesn't mean that everyone else didn’t!

Glenn Sacks concludes: “Fathers and Families has always been concerned about and stood against domestic violence” Yet on their own site they posted several comments threatening violence against me and my mother! There is absolutely no consistency (or truth) to what Glenn Sacks continues to blab on about regarding our case. He was not there, has never been a party to the case, has never had full access to all the documents involved and has thrown himself into the spotlight (no one to my knowledge ever LEGALLY asked or paid him to investigate our case) simply to reach his "20 minutes of fame" (because 15 minutes will not do if you're Glenn Sacks). I find Mr. Sacks' sentiments against domestic violence to be disingenuous since he condones, rather then condemns, the actions of those who would seek to disrupt a peaceful conference dedicated to those who escaped situations he wouldn't have the wherewithal to survive himself and then take the time to mock, ridicule, write it all up and post it. Yes, you must feel very good and proud of yourself for berating battered women and those who assist them - thank you, Mr. Sacks, for reminding us all that you're the spokesman for all that is wrong with the human race.

The most important evidence that Holly Collins saved her children from abuse is to look and listen to her children NOW. My brother and I are adults. We have clearly articulated that we were both abused by our father and that our mother is a HERO for rescuing us!

We'll say it again… Thanks Mom!

Holly Collins Presents at the 2011 Battered Mothers Custody Conference

"People Like Me"
I have been working for months on some sort of presentation that I could give today that would be unemotional and factual so I would be considered a valuable asset to this conference. Just a few days ago I learned that my attorney was able to make arrangements to be here as well and he reminded me “don’t be afraid to tell how you feel.” So the day before I left I was in panic searching through court files and old journals to try to find the words of what I was feeling and I came across this entry that I made when my children were actively being abused in 1994. It was right before I decided to rescue them and go on the run. It’s called “People Like Me”

My name is Holly Collins. I am a battered woman and I always thought that was DIRTY word and that ‘People Like Me’ are not special, social or likeable. Heck, we don’t even have the right to be. There is something about me that makes other people upset and makes them think that I owe them whatever they desire and demand. I wish I knew what was wrong with me and why I tend to bring out the worst in people.

I was severely abused as a child. The physical abuse was terrifying. The sexual abuse was debilitating. The verbal abuse was defeating. I don’t agree that verbal abuse is worse than the physical. It’s the beating that will kill a child. It’s the rape that scars forever. It all feeds each other. It’s the combination of terror, enforced by immense physical pain and unbelievable cruelty which influences the person I am today. I know I am responsible for whom I am supposed to be, but sometimes I also think that it’s just too late. I was only a little girl when I was told by my own parent “You are not lovable, hell you are not even likable.” And ‘People Like Me’ somehow believe it to be true.

When I was a kid I tried to escape the abuse in many ways, but somehow always ended up back in the hands of my abusive parents. When I was 17 I became pregnant and married a violent man. I thought that I was lucky to get away. Even though he beat me severely and put me in the hospital 3 times in the first month we were married, he still wasn’t as frightening as my parents. I was 17 years old, 5 months pregnant and I accepted that this was just the way life was for ‘People Like Me.’

My husband was in the military and we moved around. I never had the chance to make friends and I always thought that was because of the moves, but I realize it was because of his isolation. He made sure that I had no one except him. The abuse escalated to such severity that I am still ashamed to reveal. During one beating when I was 5 months pregnant, I fell to the floor and he started kicking me in the stomach. I knew that I should have stood up, but I just gave up at that point and I felt so guilty that I was not a good mother because I did not protect my unborn baby. I began to hemorrhage and when I got to the hospital, the ultrasound confirmed that my baby was dead.

My husband worked in the military hospital and his superiors were contacted because they suspected abuse. My husband was clever and calculating. Instead of curbing his abuse, he came up with this bizarre idea that I had a disease which caused spontaneous bruising. He would suddenly punch me in the face and then tell me it was for my own good so the doctors would realize that I had this disease and could they find a cure.

One night when my husband was beating me as usual, I just couldn’t keep my cries silent. I knew that I was being selfish, but I just didn’t want to risk dying alone that night. My 4 year old little boy came to my rescue and tried to protect me and his own father beat him so severely that he fractured his skull. Again I knew it was all my fault and that 'People Like Me' don’t even deserve to be a parent.

I sought the advice from our priest who told my husband that he had to move out and seek professional help. My husband hired an attorney who drafted papers giving him unsupervised visitation. That scared me more than anything so I took him back. Then the priest or doctors made a report to child protection. Child protection threatened me that if I didn’t leave then they would take the children away and I would be charged with “failure to protect.” Because 'People Like Me' are supposed to protect their children.

When I left for good, the case was transferred from Juvenile court to family court and right away the children were forced to go alone with him. I went child protection and begged for their help. I begged them: “I told you this is why I wouldn’t leave him. I told you… Now there is no one there to protect my children.” They just dismissed me that it wasn’t in their hands anymore and said that I needed to tell the judge, but the judge wouldn’t listen. Because 'People Like Me' make other people uncomfortable when we describe horrific abuse that no one wants to hear.

My children came home with bruises and stories of beatings and torture. My son blamed me many times “My dad hit me because of you. I got in trouble because of you...” No one would protect my children and I just couldn’t bear to send them alone with someone who was hurting them. I couldn’t believe what happened next. HE called the police claiming that he was the victim of a vengeful ex-wife. They would enter my home, pull my children out from underneath their beds and hand them to the man who was beating them. My daughter would cry so hard that she would throw up. Instead of confirming the children’s fears the police reports were used as evidence that I was uncooperative. And that is how 'People Like Me' find them selves at the mercy of their abusers again.

Even though the judge found that my ex-husband was abusive he was angry at me for my incomprehensible fear. I have the court transcripts of the judge actually saying “I’ve seen him and I’ve seen her. She was shaking like a scared little bird. I thought he had just beat her with a belt and then I find that they have been divorce for 2 years and that is not the behavior of a woman who has been divorced for 2 years”. And that is how 'People Like Me' loose custody of their children.

And now I have to admit that I don’t even know if there are any other 'People Like Me.' Society shuns me because 'People Like Me' do not loose their children unless they have done something terribly wrong. I keep trying to figure out what I did so wrong. It must be all my fault. My children are being abused and I can’t find a way to protect them. They look at me with such desperation and betrayal that I am the one person that should be helping them but I don’t.

I don’t know how to fix it but all I do know is that I can not stand by here and do nothing as my children also become 'People Like Me'.

Holly Collins to Speak at 2011 Battered Mothers Custody Conference

The 8th annual Battered Mothers Custody Conference.

Conference Presenters:

HOLLY COLLINS
ZACHARY COLLINS


The journey would take them to Indian reservations, Canada, Mexico, Guatemala, and finally to the Netherlands. There Holly and her children would become the first American family to ever be granted political asylum by the Dutch government on the grounds that they were fleeing domestic violence and that their safety could not be assured if they were to be returned to the United States.

Once in the Netherlands, Holly and children were first sent to live in a refugee center, where they lived shoulder to shoulder in dorm-like quarters with a ragged collection of truly desperate souls from third world countries like Sudan and Somalia. After two years of life among the refugees, Holly was granted full asylum and was sent to live in a housing project. She would live “below the radar” for the next 14 years. And then, after all those years, the FBI finally found them and came knocking on the door.

But by now, Holly’s American children were over 18, and had “aged out of the system”. The Child and Family Court system back home in Minnesota, the one that had once ordered the minor children to go to live full time with Holly’s abusive ex-husband, no longer had any jurisdiction over them. And when the FBI interviewed the children they said that in their eyes, their mother was a hero who had saved their lives. The FBI dropped the case.

Holly obtained attorney Alan Rosenfeld back in the states who eventually arranged a plea bargain on the remaining state charges against Holly. If she would come back and plead guilty to contempt of court, all other charges would be dismissed. Holly agreed, saying that she did indeed have contempt for the court that ordered her children to live a life of abuse.

Despite her life on the run, Holly Collins was somehow able to preserve an enormous volume of court transcripts, medical records, news accounts and correspondence that support her account, and the accounts of her children and give vivid detail to each twist and turn.

In the end, what could have been a crushing family tragedy becomes a happy story. Holly’s has been exonerated. Her children thrive. And they look forward to returning home, to America. But none of it happened by accident. This story ends happily because of the singular character of Holly Collins, protective mother, kidnapper, international fugitive, and ground breaking asylum seeker. It ends happily because of Holly, a woman who is described by her Dutch Asylum lawyer, as “a lioness.” And that she is.

Introduction written by Barry Nolan

"Shared Parenting" is not in the Best Interest of Children

Other governments are finally getting it! Shared Parenting does not work when there is domestic violence of any kind! Now it is time for the United States to enforce the protection of American Children!

Overhaul of family law gives children priority
http://www.couriermail.com.au/lifestyle/parenting/overhaul-of-family-law-gives-children-priority/story-e6frer7o-1225952251213

PROPOSED changes to the Family Law Act will offer unprecedented protection to children who have at times been treated as ''chattels'', a Queensland MP says.

Shayne Neumann, with 20 years' experience in family law, says the planned changes released yesterday are a fundamental shift away from the interests of parents back to the interests of children.

''Children are not chattels and these changes recognise that,'' he said.

The Commonwealth Attorney-General, Robert McClelland, and NSW Attorney-General, John Hatzistergos, released an outline of the proposed changes.

They radically alter the approach taken in 2006 under the Howard government, which changed the Family Law Act to emphasise shared parenting.

The 2006 laws were championed by men's rights groups and were seen to better serve fathers seeking access to children after divorce or separation.

Crucially, under the proposed changes a court would be forced to put a child's protection from potential abuse above all considerations, even the child's right to have a relationship with both parents.

Mr Neumann, the Labor member for Blair, said the push by fathers' rights groups had driven the law too far towards parents' rights.

Under the changes, family violence would be redefined to recognise forms other than assault, sexual abuse or sexual exploitation.

The new definitions include a long list of criteria, including any behaviour that torments, intimidates or harasses a family.

''If a child is being forced to clean up blood after mum has been hit, for example, I believe that is a form of violence,'' Mr Neumann said.

He said a secondary effect would be that mothers would be protected from violent partners because they would be restrained from having relationships with anyone who posed a threat to the child.

''I think these changes will benefit everyone because, ultimately, they will lead to better parenting from both mothers and fathers.''

Mr McClelland said he wanted laws ensuring child safety concerns outweighed the need for a child to have a meaningful relationship with both parents.

''The courts will be required to have regards to, first and foremost, the welfare of the best interests of the child.''

The draft legislation is open for public comment until January next year.

Abused American Children receive Asylum Status in Holland

This is my response to the article about American refugees:

One of the refugee camps in the Netherlands where the Collins family was held.

My name is Jennifer Collins. I am the daughter of the woman you mentioned in the article, American Citizens Seek Asylum in Great Britain. My mother, Holly Collins was the first American to be granted asylum in another country.

I don't know how it works in Great Britain but we certainly didn't have a "posh" stay in the Netherlands refugee camps. I vividly remember being hungry and embarrassed that my shoes had holes in them and that my mom had to wash out our few pairs of socks and underwear in the bathroom sink. She worked hard scrubbing floors and toilets for 50 cents and hour to feed us.

It is important to remember that we were granted asylum because my father was dangerous and had vowed to murder my mother, my brothers and me. He testified that he strangled us kids and broke my mother’s nose several times. He attacked her with a knife and fractured my 4 years old brother’s skull in a drunken tirade. Yet the local family court felt that my mother's fear of my father was interfering in his relationship with his children.

We lived in anonymity for 14 years until we were found by the FBI. It is important to mention that the United States dropped all federal criminal kidnapping charges against my mother. She refused to apologize to a egotistical county judge who was out for revenge and voluntarily plead guilty to one count of contempt of court as noted in the court records: "I admit to having contempt for the court which failed to protect my children."

We are still residing in the Netherlands and will be eternally grateful for grating us asylum despite our privileged American nationality.

All children have the right to be safe!

Kind Regards,
Jennifer Collins

Tell Me Again... What is Parental Alienation Syndrome?

First of All... Parental Alienation is NOT a recognized Syndrome!


I have seen this drawing from my brother for several years now, but I never fully looked at it and realized how it is such a clear depliction of how domestic violence affects children.

PAS is nothing more than an Abuse Excuse

Directory of Jennifer Collins 5 Part Investigation of the Real Glenn Sacks

In a 5 part series, a university student and child abuse survivor Jennifer Collins investigates the unethical men's columnist (Glenn Sacks) who has been virtually stalking her and her family.

Part I
Preface
Introduction
Anti-Education
Employment (Or lack thereof)
Fatherhood
Parenting Problems
Power And Control

Part II
Do not hate your father
Hate your Mother
It's Okay to Hate Women
Resent Your Wives
Stay At Home Dads
Boys are not Stupid
Boys will be (bad) Boys
Push Girls out Windows
Strong vs Abusive fathers
Distortion
Dumb Dads
American Conspiracy Against Men
Abuse of Power

Part III
I chose my children names
Primary caregiver
Paternal Gate-keeping
Teaching His Son to Disrespect Women
Raising His Son to be an Abuser
Yes Master
It Sucks Having a Dad
Dad is a Looser
Hostile Children
Favoritism In The Sacks Family
Setting Up His Daughter for Dependency on a Man
Kids Don’t Need Dads Like Glenn Sacks
Making Kids Afraid of Divorce
No Need for a Protest To Protect Girls
Inappropriate Parent-Child Boundaries Abound
Puppet Child
Over Enmeshed
Humiliating Pregnant Teen
Those Who Live In Glass Houses

Part IV
Forced Marriage
Minimizing Domestic Violence
Blaming the Victim
Do Not Arrest Batterers
Defending Wife Beaters
Defending Child Sex Abusers
Attacking Protective Parents
Defending Child Rapists
Defending Child Abusers
Minimizing Child Abuse
On Parental Alienation

Part IV
Readers Urged to Investigate Cases
Lie to Prove HIS Point
Opportunist
Opinion Poll Says
Boys Egos above Girls Saftey
Kidnapping Justified for Men Only
Abusive Mothers
Afraid of Being Charged With Child Rape
Covert Incest
Fathers & Families Site Promoting Violence
Cleaning up Fathers & Families
Fathers Rights Above Children’s Safety
Truth never damages
Disclaimer
Final thoughts

This is the Real Glenn Sacks Part V by Jennifer Collins

College student Jennifer Collins completes her investigation on the unethical men’s rights columnist who has been invading her family’s privacy. (Part 5)

Sacks Asks Readers to Investigate Cases
With a topic as sensitive as gang rape, Glenn Sacks asks his readers to investigate! “I was surprised and disturbed by the (gang rape) case, and asked one of my most intelligent readers, Stan Eads, to review the information in the case”1

Despite Glenn Sacks bogus disclaimer: "I did not ask him to find reasons why the feminists are wrong--I told him, ‘what you find is what you find.’"This is exactly what he did in our case!: "Volunteers Needed for Parental Alienation Project." Again, Glenn Sacks did a shout out to thousands of readers to investigate our case! “Now here's my question--would anybody (or group of two or three people) like to investigate the Collins case for me? To be clear, I do NOT want people who will go in with the intent of proving Holly Collins to be a liar and Jennifer deluded--I want the truth, whichever way it falls. If you find that what Holly and Jennifer claim happened is true, I will make it clear that this is your finding. I will publish your results here on my blog with full credit to you if you wish.”2

I personally responded to Glenn Sacks. I shared the facts of our case with him. He just ignored everything I said! Looks like Glenn Sacks is not a man of his word after all!

Lies to Prove HIS Point
Glenn Sacks: “I investigated the case because misguided and misled domestic violence and feminist advocates are citing it to support the family law changes they seek. These changes will unwittingly make it easier for women (or men) to employ false accusations of abuse against their spouses or former spouses in order to win custody, and will make it even harder for fathers (and mothers) to fight parental alienation.”3 Glenn Sacks actually equates parental alienation with child abuse prevention!

In our specific case Glenn Sacks consciously decided to defend my abusive father at all costs. He ignored the most important factor: that my brother and I are grown and can articulate exactly what happened to us when we were younger. That doesn’t seem to matter to Glenn Sacks. He is determined to promote his cause, even if it means supporting a child abuser and forsaking the child victims! As the documented and legally undisputed victims in this case, my mother, brother and I are the experts in what happened on our case and our truth should be considered above and beyond the false statements made by Glenn Sacks in his sadistic attempt to try to defend my father.

Glenn Sacks: “Holly Collins has repeatedly made accusations of domestic violence or child abuse to a variety of courts, and courts have continually rejected her claims.”4 That is so not true! Our mother was granted several Orders for Protection which were further extended for a year each time!

Glenn Sacks: “Holly Collins has repeatedly accused Mark Collins of fracturing their son Zachary's skull in a violent rage. However, the injury was sustained by Zachary when he fell forward on a ride in an amusement park.”5

Glenn Sacks built his whole case against my mother on this lie he bought from my father. Mr. Sacks, shouldn’t you be angry that my father made a complete fool out of you by getting you to buy into his lies and worse, get you to publicly endorse them? How humiliating! Moreover I absolutely disproved Glenn Sacks lies with the medical records and x-ray reports from the amusement park incident that documented that there were “no broken bones.” I proved beyond a shadow of doubt that the medical records clearly showed that my brother’s skull was broken accompanied by swelling of the soft tissue as a direct result from the incident where my father beat up my brother.

Glenn Sacks: “When Holly was 16 years-old she had a dispute with her mother, who wanted her to finish high school before getting married to Mark Collins. As a result of this dispute, Holly desired to live with her biological father, from whom Eleanor Gallagher was divorced.”6
Again Glenn Sacks makes up things that aren’t even there let alone true. I guess he is confident that no one will challenge him. My mother met my father when she was 16 years old. She was living with her father as early as May 1982. She became pregnant when she was 17 years old. That is when the subject of marriage came up. My brother wasn’t born until almost a year later in April 1983. Sacks math and lies just don’t add up at all!

Glenn Sacks: “The Guardian ad Litem conducted a custody evaluation. During this custody evaluation, Holly made no accusation of abuse against either her mother Eleanor Gallagher or her stepfather Tom Gallagher. Yet a decade later she accused both of them of having abused her while she was a child.”7

I have seen the court records where custody of my mother was reversed to her biological father in 1982 because she admitted to abuse from her mother and step-father. There are even reports from my mother's high school teachers describing the abuse. I find it highly suspicious that Glenn Sacks make such a bru-ha-ha over other people supposedly making up false allegations when that’s all he ever does. And then, not only is he allowed to get away with it but his followers admire him for it?!

I know that Glenn Sacks is an opportunist that had to get in on a ‘hot’ story. He really missed out on a perfectly good case of a father wronged by the system here with my grandfather. My mother’s mother, Eleanor Gallagher was accused of child abuse when my mother was a kid. She went to all sorts of lengths to keep her exhusband away from his children. My mother even testified in court that her mother and stepfather abused her as a child. Custody was finally reversed to my mother’s father. Now Sacks suddenly allies with an abusive woman. It is so suspicious! It goes to show that Glenn Sacks is not concerned first and foremost with father’s rights. He is main priority is how he can personally capitalize on a hot story.

Glenn Sacks: “Holly invented mythical food allergies for the children which were contradicted by many medical professionals. Once custody of Zachary and Jennifer was switched from Holly Collins to Mark Collins, the allergies soon dissipated.”8

This is blatantly false! The pediatrician referred us to a pediatric allergist because I had an allergic reaction at McDonalds when my parents were still married. After performing independent medical tests our allergist wrote a report saying that we were the ‘most allergic patients he had ever seen.’ What was my mother to believe? If she didn’t trust the doctors and follow their advice you can be sure my father and Glenn Sacks would accuse her of being a bad and neglectful mother. Zachary and I still have allergies and our doctor in Holland has publically stated that we are in fact the most allergic patients her clinic has even seen! I heard that my father’s mother, Mrs. Gerald W. Collins from Salem N.H.9 has had severe anaphylactic reactions to various foods and almost died on several occasions. Their neighbors report several ambulance visits due to her allergies and asthma attacks. Gee “Dad”… I wonder where my allergies came from. Shame on you for using our medical condition as another way to abuse us!

Just in our case alone I have proven over and over again that Glenn Sacks is a liar. Nothing Glenn Sacks writes can be believed.

Opportunist
Glenn Sacks exploited my mother, my brother and me just to gain additional publicity for himself to satisfy his insatiable need for attention. Glenn Sacks wrote over 6 articles over our case, attacked our mother in more articles and even referred to her unrelated articles! Several of Sacks unrelated articles end with “To learn more about the Holly Collins case, see my findings on it here.”

Sacks commented “The Holly Collins custody/parental abduction case is perhaps the most prominent custody case in the media at this moment”11

Heaven forbid a story of that magnitude not includes Glenn Sacks! Shrugging off the criticism, Sacks feverishly works to transform his “15 minutes of fame” into a full-time soap box gig so he can continue to keep his self-serving discussion of other men's and fathers' issues perpetuated. Judging from the attention his campaign gathered, the near-celebrity status he has maintained since, and the hundreds of fan letters he receives weekly, his strategy seems to be succeeding. PT Barnum once said “There’s a sucker born every minute”; sad how they all seem to congregate around and follow Mr. Sacks.

Disturbingly, Wikipedia announced “Sacks is also known for the campaign he waged against Holly and Jennifer Collins, mother and daughter granted asylum in the Netherlands American Family Receives Asylum in Europe, Holly Collins returns after 14 years in hiding. He has published numerous articles on Holly and Jennifer Collins: Numerous Parallels Between McCarty, Collins International Abuduction Cases, The Feminist Family Law Movement Fires Back over Holly Collins Case… Jennifer is an adult and has requested an apology for what appears to a logical person to be a personal attack on Jennifer, Jennifer Collins: ‘Glenn Sacks owes my family an apology over Controversial Parental Alienation Case’. To date, no apology has been published by either party.”12

He even used my brother’s name to tag his articles even though my brother personally asked him to respect his privacy!13 – THAT’S the lengths Glenn Sacks will go to to assure his place in the spotlight.

Could it be that there has been a protest to the manner that Glenn Sacks tags his articles? “As many of you have noticed, lately we've been resolving some technical issues with the tags…” Which have now been removed from the website.”14

After Glenn Sacks exploited our names over and over again, he claimed that he could not be held liable (even though we proved he blatantly lied in his articles) by suddenly claiming that we were public figures. Our intent was not to stay in the public eye and my mother proved this by immediately going back to her quiet life in the Netherlands despite Glenn Sacks constantly trying to goad her out into a public debate.

Opinion Poll Says
Truth and Justice: Family Court Reform “Sacks and Leving do not support their claims with facts, as I personally have looked up some of their claims and found that the actual studies did not support what they wrote, and some of their true stories are actually fiction, as they put disclaimers near the end, stating that this is how ‘some men feel’. Gotta read that fine print hidden in the body of their lengthy FR manifestos.”15

Ms. Grieco of NOW says Glenn Sacks is a 'women-bashing, backlash shock-jock radio host."16

“when men like Sacks broadcast misinformation, skew statistics, and attack women's rights in order to advance their own cause, they are only harming everyone's agenda.”17

Boys Egos Above Girls Safey
Most people agree that young women who are starting college and are away from the protection of their parents for the first time in their lives should be educated about self-protection. But not Mr. Sacks! He objects that “in the first week of college orientation, 'they' hand out pamphlets about rape on college campuses and it says 1 out of 4 will be raped, blah blah blah,"18 Yes, Glenn Sacks actually says “Blah Blah Blah”! Sacks argues that by trying to protect young women from rape and physical attacks we upset young men: "Bang! Eighteen-year-old guys, right from the beginning, are stigmatized, vilified, lied about."19 How can Glenn Sacks be so desensitized to rape especially when he has a pre-teen daughter himself!

The truth according to (Warshaw, Robin 1994 "I Never Called It Rape"): “In a study of 6,000 students at 32 colleges in the US, 1 in 4 women had been the victims of rape or attempted rape.” Glenn Sacks calls these statistics “Preposterous” and “Absurd,"20

The truth according to Sacks: “it's not true that 1 out of 4 female college students is a victim of attempted or real rape.”21

Who’s telling the truth here? You decide!

Kidnapping Justified for Men Only
Sacks writes “Fathers & Families has an interesting new piece on Clark Rockefeller’s apparent abduction of his 7-year-old daughter during a supervised visitation… I condemn Rockefeller’s actions. However, his possible mistreatment in his divorce also bears mention.”22

I find it odd the cases Glenn Sacks decides to stand up for. This ‘Rockefeller’ guy has several different aliases, no social security number and refused to reveal his true identity during the custody hearing.23 The couple wasn’t even married! This is the type of character that Sacks chooses to report on, suggesting that his ‘mistreatment’ in a divorce somehow softens his actions. He wasn’t even legally married to the child’s mother!

Isn’t it interesting when a man undeniably kidnaps his child during supervised visitation, Glenn Sacks refers to it as an “apparent kidnapping” however in my personal case when we (my brother and I) as adult children admit that we ran away, Sacks immediately reports my mother as kidnapping us without the softening of ‘apparent’ which he allotted Rockefeller. “Holly Collins kidnapped her two children and took them to Holland in 1994”24 All parental abduction charges against my mother were dismissed and therefore she is NOT guilty of the false allegations of kidnapping Glenn Sacks has personally lodged against her. Ooops, I forgot – if it’s a man making an accusation, it can’t be a false allegation because according to Glenn Sacks only women lie, right?

Abusive Mothers
Despite case after case where there is documented abuse, Sacks continues to defend male abusers. However if there is a case where the abuser is a female, Sacks is all too happy to capitalize on another story of an abusive mother. It shouldn’t matter what the gender of a child abusers is! This isn’t a gender partisan issue - all child abuse is wrong!

Afraid of Being Charged With Child Rape
The more I dug into Glenn Sacks personal life the more worried I became. Glenn Sacks is afraid of being arrested for the rape of a child. “my 16-year-old son and my 10-year-old daughter have their friends sleeping over at our house all the time. So four years from now one of my daughter's friends can claim that I raped her and on her word alone I'll be thrown and held in prison?”25

Are “normal” dads worried about this? I asked several men myself (including my step-father) and they all said that the only reason why Glenn Sacks worries about this is because there is probably some truth to it. I wonder if someone should warn the other parents at the Sacks daughters’ school. It appears that Sacks might be setting up his defense already for the day when a teenage girl comes forward and says “Glenn Sacks raped me.” Then he’ll be able to say “See I knew this was going to happen! That is why I wrote about it.” Is Glenn Sacks already working on his get out of jail free card?

Covert Incest
Covert Incest was defined in the 1980s as "an emotionally abusive relationship between a parent and child that does not involve sexual intercourse."26 Covert Incest refers to a form of emotional abuse in which the relationship between a parent and a child is inappropriately sexualized without actual sexual contact. Over and over again Sacks obsession with his ‘close’ relationship with his daughter grows more and more disturbing:

"A man never knows what love is until he has a daughter."

Glenn Sacks reports that his wife “says my daughter took one look at me and thought, ‘Sucker! All I have to do is smile at this big, dumb guy and he'll give me whatever I want.’ Probably true.”

“As soon as she could indicate a preference or talk, she usually wanted daddy in the middle of the night”

“These times with my daughter… were the greatest of my life.” (Curiously ignoring the fact that Sacks has another child as well.)

“For me, being at home with my young daughter has been the greatest, most fulfilling experience of my life”

“I supervise the children on a day to day basis and I make sure that things are done the way I want them done.”

“I've been able to enjoy with my daughter, as well as countless other magical, irreplaceable moments”.

“My favorite thing is when I put her to bed, tell her stories and she falls asleep in my arms. For the first nine years of her life, she fell asleep in my arms like that practically every night.”

“And there's nothing better in the world than when my little daughter walks up to me, puts her hand on my shoulder and says ‘every night I go sleepies right here’."

Sacks: “Listen, then tell me again how kids don’t need their dads… “Hi Daddy it’s me. I just want to say that I love you and I miss you a lot (sobbing). Bye.”

Next call. “I miss you so much I really do. I miss you! When can you come home? I miss you! Call me back as soon as you get to NY or to LA or Burbank wherever. Just call me! Okay? Anytime, just call me! Call Me!”

“it makes my daughter very nervous. She said ‘I'm not ever going to lose you, am I daddy?’ I reached back and held her hand and said ‘no’.”

Covert Incest involves similar interpersonal dynamics as a relationship between sexual partners. Problems between parents often facilitate Covert Incest; as the parents distance themselves from each other both physically and emotionally, one parent may begin focusing on his/her child. The child becomes the surrogate partner and source of emotional support for the parent. It is described as an over enmeshed parent responding to a child's love with adult sexuality.

There are many red flags when I read Glenn Sacks reaching out to his followers asking for some sort of recognition for his deepest inappropriate feelings for his own daughter. “As a parent, have you had the following experience?”27

Sacks “Watching her I was overcome with my love for her, as I often am. I called her over and tried to explain how special times like these are for me, how lucky we are to have each other and to have had these 10 years together.”28

No, Glenn Sacks is not expressing his love for his wife. He is professing his love for a 10 year-old child and he interrupts whatever it is she was doing in order to tell her this!

Sacks: “there's a part of me that wishes that for five minutes I could be talking to the adult version of my daughter. The 40-year-old mother who could for that moment understand how I felt as a parent, instead of how my daughter feels as a child.”29

Why is it always about Glenn Sacks and validating his feelings, his wants, his needs, his observations, his opinions? Why isn’t he sharing his thoughts and feelings appropriately with his wife instead of fantasizing about his daughter being a 40 year-old mother who in his mind will act as his confidante? And then Glenn Sacks worries about being charged with child rape! “one of my daughter's friends can claim that I raped her and on her word alone…”30 I find it terribly frightening that anyone is leaving their little girl alone with Glenn Sacks!

Fathers & Families Site Promoting Violence
Sacks endlessly obsessed over the saying on a t-shirt, calling it “male bashing” which he says leads to “many boys feel(ing) the deck is stacked against them” which in turn becomes his excuse for young men to retaliate against young women. Sacks himself promotes the very violence that he issues slight disclaimers against!

On a more personal note, Glenn Sacks didn’t object to but allowed, encouraged and actually posted a comment on his site from a guy saying that my battered mother should be “gang raped” for running with her children to protect them from a court recognized abuser! THIS comment written in anger is ok with Mr. Sacks but “Boys are stupid; throw rocks at them” written in jest on a kid’s t-shirt is not?!

Of course Mr. Sacks will try to explain it away with his boomerang theory. Look at his point of view about our personal case: 'If a woman takes a mans kids away from him because he is beating them then the woman should be punished in the most deplorable manner; such as being gang raped and thrown into prison.'

Glenn Sacks didn’t remove this offensive remark as well as other threats from his angry followers from his site until there was a public uprising against the violence the Father’s & Family site was promoting.

I have to believe that the majority of men do not realize what Glenn Sacks is promoting. I am all for father’s rights! Children deserve to have a good father and good mother in their lives. However Glenn Sacks systematically and emphatically supports abusive fathers, like my father who beat me, my brother and our mom in front of us as well! I sincerely doubt the general population of men and dads would want this guy speaking for them on their behalves.

Cleaning Up Fathers & Families
Father’s & Families is trying to clean up this site. “An Announcement Concerning Blog Comments & letters to the editor” saying that some commenters “seems to be incapable of complying with our posted blog rules.”31 Uh, that’s what happens when you deal with abusers and batterers Mr. Sacks – they IGNORE all posted rules, guidelines and (court) orders.

Here are a few examples of comments placed on Glenn Sacks/Father’s & Families site about the child psychologist, Dr. Silberg who helped me through my mother’s criminal case.

Tommy says "Silberg is a blood-thirsty feminist who wants to further the subjugation of men under the current legal system of family law and divorce court."32

Roy replies “You know, you are never going to get laid with that kind of attitude. You need to find a kinder and gentler way of describing women. I like to use terms like parasite, vampire, predator, raunch girls, etc. You can call a woman any of these names and they will still go to bed with you."33

Could it be that there has been a protest to the manner that Glenn Sacks tags his articles? “As many of you have noticed, lately we've been resolving some technical issues with the tags and the comments, and to do so we have removed both from the website.”34

Fathers Rights Above Children’s Safety
Glenn Sacks regurgitates story after story of how men are wronged by family courts and society in general. Even in the most obvious cases of child abuse and murder Glenn Sacks finds himself siding with the abuser and murderer!

Sacks even capitalized on a case where a man killed his entire family sensationalizing this tragedy with his headline “Even When I Couldn't Be Less Surprised.” Sacks basically allied with the murderer. At the end of the article he has a one sentence disclaimer, but it is not very believable: “What (the murderer) did was absolutely unforgivable under any circumstances. However, given the number of these stories I hear, it's not surprising that once in a while there's a guy who's going to react this way.”35

Truth Never Damages
Glenn Sacks has the audacity to quote Gandhi: “Truth never damages a cause that is just.”36 Glenn Sacks uses horrendous details of rape and sexual abuse to humiliate abuse victims under the pretence that he only prints the truth and the truth can’t hurt. It is despicable that Glenn Sacks humiliates a rape victim with true details of the rape! Glenn Sacks distorts the truth and outright lies over and over again. Yet he has the nerve to point to and accuse innocent victims: “one way for Stop Family Violence to start would be to publicly disavow false accusers such as Collins”37


Disclaimer
With Glenn Sacks history of denouncing every bit of abuse my brother and I suffered as children because of an article I wrote 1994 instead of 1984 (it was a TYPO folks! I hit the wrong key!) the main point of the story was referring to a well documented incident. To be specific, the first documented incidents of abuse by my father of my mother occurred in 1982. The first documented incidents of abuse by my father of me and my brother occurred in 1987. Child protection became involved in our case in 1987 before my parents were even divorced. We received several Order for Protections against our father before the custody hearing even began in 1992.

Final Thoughts
Considering all the serious issues Glenn Sacks seeks to address, I just find it mind blowing that Mr. Sacks dedicates so much time and gets so riled up over the saying on a t-shirt. Remember “As the father of an 11 year-old boy this shirt makes my blood boil….degrading boys, insulting them, making our schools a hostile environment for them–we’re not taking it any more.” How is it that Mr. Sacks is such a staunch opponent to the way little boys are treated in public school when so many little boys are treated much worse by their own fathers in their own homes? I invite you to take a really good look at the drawings my brother did as a child. Good men and fathers don’t need Mr. Sacks because good men and fathers would never cause a child to be this afraid of them.



















Index
1http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1183
2http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2788
3 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3271
4 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
5 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
6 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
7 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
8 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
9http://www.whitepages.com/search/FindPerson?firstname_begins_with=1&firstname=gerald&name=collins&where=salem+nh
10 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3322
11 http://www.glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
12 http://wpedia.goo.ne.jp/enwiki/Glenn_Sacks/?from=websearch
13 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3265
1402/06/2010 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4565
15 http://truthinscotsthistle.blogspot.com/2006/07/rebuttal-to-glenn-sacks-on-pas-article.html
16 http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html/(page)/2
17 http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html/(page)/2
18 http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html/(page)/2
19http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html/(page)/2
20 http://www.csmonitor.com/2004/0331/p16s01-lihc.html/(page)/2
21 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1860
22 http://blogwonks.com/2008/07/30/rockefeller-kidnapping-case-what-else-bears-mention/ 23 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clark_Rockefeller
24 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3082
25 (1/16/09): http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3220
26 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Covert_incest
27 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
28 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
29 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
30 (1/16/09): http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3220
31 father and family stop comments
32http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2799
33http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2799
34 02/06/2010 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4565
35 http://www.glennsacks.com/enewsletters/enews_5_3_06.htm
36 http://www.menstuff.org/columns/sacks/04.html
37 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4029

The Real Glenn Sacks Part III by Jennifer Collins

University student, Jennifer Collins investigates the columnist who has been virtually stalking her and her family. (Part 3)

I chose my children names
Glenn Sacks monopolized parenthood even before his children were born!

“My son's middle name is that of an ancient emperor who was known for his fairness and wisdom. When my wife was pregnant with our second child, I wanted to name the child "Spartacus," but she nixed the idea. I admit she was right, particularly since my second child is a girl. However, had our child been all boy, he would have been named "Magellan."1

Mr. Sacks wonders why his son was picked on in school – can you just imagine how much worse it could have been?

“My daughter ended up with a unique and relatively interesting name anyway. Her first name, which I chose, comes from an important battle in American history. Her middle name, which I also chose, is the name of a famous feminist and abolitionist.”2

So the only involvement Mrs. Sacks was allowed to have with her son (aside from carrying him to term and going through childbirth to deliver him) was nixing the name “Spartacus”? I wonder if Mr. Sacks even allowed his wife to have a baby shower (because that would mean attention being diverted away from him being given to her).

Primary caregiver
“I've been the primary caregiver for my two children for the last 8 1/2 years (since a few weeks after my daughter was born)” 3 Yet he wasn’t even satisfied with that role. “it somehow didn't feel as if I was doing anything, or at least not any work that I could quantify.” 4

In 2010, 46 year-old Glenn Sacks continues to milk off his wife - even though his kids are now 12 and almost 18! Once his daughter graduates from high school, what excuse will he come up with next to avoid “lowering himself” by getting a legitimate, contributing job?

Paternal Gate-keeping
Glenn Sacks has capitalized on his coined phrase “maternal gate-keeping.” His own words betray the very point he tries to make.

“I dispute the idea--the idea!--that because I'm male my love for my daughter and my son is somehow cheaper, lesser, not as good, not up to par, not as important. I'm angered over the way fathers have been vilified over the past three decades.” 5

Where did Mr. Sacks get such an idea and who is vilifying fathers? The only fathers I see vilified are the ones who kill or abuse their children or the mothers of their children. The messages I’m constantly hearing about fathers are positive and I see pro-fatherhood initiatives all over the place – even from the White House!

“I think this maternal gate-keeping the study discusses is very real, and is a significant barrier between dads and their kids.” Sacks’ solution is most troubling: "Fathers need to start parenting the way they want to parent. When they do there's no guarantee that the mother will go along with it, and that can cause problems, but men need to stop waiting for their wives' approval. It's like a little boy waiting for mommy to say it's OK. Go be the father you want to be. Don't wait--do it." 6

“I could always comfort my daughter in the middle of the night when she was a baby. As soon as she could indicate a preference or talk, she usually wanted daddy in the middle of the night” 7 Why is Mr. Sacks so competitive and obsessed with being able to out-do his wife? Why is being a mom secondary to his father supremacy?

“The most important issue in any marriage is deciding how to raise the children. While my wife is an equal partner in any major decision regarding the children, I supervise the children on a day to day basis and I make sure that things are done the way I want them done.” 8

Teaching His Son to Disrespect Women
“I rather sympathize with the woman in the AT & T cell phone commercial. The guy should have been much more subtle. A lesson I teach my son–if your wife or significant other does catch you looking at another woman, say the following: ‘I’m a compassionate man. I sometimes like to see what other men must settle for beauty. (Add wistful sigh) It’s sad, really.” 9 The only thing I find sad here is what he’s teaching his son!

Raising His Son to be an Abuser
Glenn Sacks consistently makes excuses for his son’s bad behavior: “Similarly, rather than reform a system woefully out of touch with boys' real world natures and needs, our schools find it easier to demand that boys be something other than boys” 10

“It also angers me that we’re telling girls that it’s OK to hate boys. When males insult females we call it ‘woman-hating’ and ‘misogyny.’ When females insult males, apparently its OK. No more.” 11 No it’s not okay for anyone to hate anyone based on gender, race or religion! Glenn Sacks ridiculously proposes that a tasteless t-shirt incites bad behavior that is basically his excuse to justify domestic violence!

"Yes, it's humor, but it's adult humor being played out on little boys. Twelve year-old boys don't get the humor, but they feel the insult.” 12 Responsible parents put sensitive issues in perspectives for their children – they’re called “teachable moments”. A year later and Glenn Sacks son was still having trouble processing the wording on a single t-shirt. WHY??? It sounds like Mr. Sacks clearly missed this is one “teachable moment.” And what parent would publicly prove a point at his own child’s expense? When I brought up the t-shirt story to my little brothers a year later they replied “Oh yeah… that was kind of funny.”

“When boys are insulted, boys are humiliated, boys feel trashed upon, that's going to boomerang back around on girls… One way or another, by creating this kind of hostility in boys, that's going to boomerang back on girls," 13

WARNING!!!! It’s disgusting that Glenn Sacks is setting up a ready-made excuse for rape and violence against women! He basically says that it is society’s fault that boys/men mistreat girls/women!

Yes Master
Glenn Sacks not only degrades his wife in his article but he also humiliates his sensitive teenage son. He dedicates an article with the sarcastic title “The Joy of Parenting a Teenager.” Can you imagine how that would make this young man feel? Especially after his father has demonstrated to us over the years how sensitive his teenage boy is? “Over the weekend I took my wife and my 15-year-old-son to a… comedy show… I had bought excellent seats, and at the show I bought my son a (omit name) T-shirt and other memorabilia. After the show we came home and, after we pulled in, I asked my son to close the gate to our driveway. He replied: ‘Yes, Master’."14 Is Mr. Sacks getting any of this? Does he understand what his son is trying to tell him here? What does it say about the standing of a person when they reply “Yes Master”?

It Sucks Having a Dad
Me (Glenn): “I know, I know, it sucks having a dad”.
My son: “No, it sucks having YOU for a dad”. 15

I don’t think Glenn’s son could get any more clear or direct with his father then this (in case Mr. Sacks missed the previous “Yes Master” allusion).

Dad is a Looser
“Now that they’re growing up–my son is a junior in high school and he doesn’t want to spend time with my wife or I, he wants to be with his friends. A few years ago I may have been “G-Dawg” but now in his eyes I’m just (sigh) “Loser G.”16 Now THAT should tell you something!

“I explained that now my teenage son thinks that I live a pathetic existence and that I have no life. My son nodded in agreement.” 17

“There’s only one part of being a parent which I’ve ever genuinely disliked and that’s forcing my son through his homework. Then again, every job has its downsides.”18 I think it is interesting here how Glenn Sacks referred to parenting as a “job” with downsides. Throughout his publications of his family life years ago, Sacks has consistently and openly shared his distain for disciplining his struggling son as in his article “The essence of teenager.”

“The first and third comments (in the darker writing) are from me to my 16 year-old son as he is (supposedly) doing his Spanish homework. The second and fourth comments (in lighter writing) are his.”

Sacks writes: “Why has so little been done?”
Sacks son: “It’s been a little hard thinking for some reason.”
Sacks: “I love you.”
Sacks son: “… Such a loser” 19

At the end of the note the boy supposedly wrote ‘love you too’ but I can’t help but wonder – did he say that sincerely or sarcastically? Was he trying to appease his father so he’s shut up, go away and stop bothering him so he could finish his homework? Why in the world would any parent humiliate their child in such a manner as this? In addition this article brought on several criticisms from angry fathers who made it clear that they would not tolerate this behavior from their children. Again…. Why would Sacks do this???

Hostile Children
Sacks: “My teenage son thinks that I live a pathetic existence and that I have no life.” 20

Favoritism In The Sacks Family
"A man never knows what love is until he has a daughter."21 Wait a minute here…. Since Sacks is so against having children out of wedlock, we assume that he is addressing most married men. What about the Love he supposedly has/is supposed to have for his wife and his first born son???

“She (his wife) says my daughter took one look at me and thought, ‘Sucker! All I have to do is smile at this big, dumb guy and he'll give me whatever I want.’ Probably true.”22 So what exactly is he teaching his daughter here? The very thing he complains about and loathes in women!

“These times with my daughter… were the greatest of my life.”23 What about his son??!!
“For me, being at home with my young daughter has been the greatest, most fulfilling experience of my life”24

“All of the "firsts" that I missed with my son--the first words, the first steps--I've been able to enjoy with my daughter, as well as countless other magical, irreplaceable moments”. 25

Does Mr. Sacks even think about how his son would feel reading all of this? If his son EVER had any doubts about “dad playing favorites” he’s got proof positive right here. I’m seriously so sad for his son!

Setting Up His Daughter for Dependency on a Man
“My favorite thing is when I put her to bed, tell her stories and she falls asleep in my arms. For the first nine years of her life, she fell asleep in my arms like that practically every night.”26 It is very touching that Glenn Sacks reads to his daughter at night. More parents should, but what I find troubling here is that Glenn Sacks has made it clear that he is in charge of his children. He spends the whole day alone with his children. Now he confesses that he also monopolizes bedtime as well? A good parent would encourage bonding between the other parent and the children. Mr. Sacks adds pathology to the nickname “Daddy’s Girl” here. Can you just imagine the kind of relationship problems his daughter’s bound to have with the men in her life?

Another thing, I have learned in my pedagogy studies (as well as by watching my own mother with my younger siblings) that it is important that children can learn (and need to learn) how to fall asleep by themselves. Of course it is very sweet to watch them fall asleep occasionally during bedtime stories, but psychologists unanimously agree that children need to be able to fall asleep on their own.

“And there's nothing better in the world than when my little daughter walks up to me, puts her hand on my shoulder and says ‘every night I go sleepies right here’."27 So disturbing!!! She was 4 years-old and still baby talking! Again, that child should be sleeping alone in her bed at night!

“My daughter sometimes forces me to watch it with her. Well, "forces" isn't exactly accurate, since she snuggles up in my arms as we watch”28 Yet another insight into another instance in the Sacks household where Mrs. Sacks has been excluded. I feel so bad for her. Moreover, notice how Mr. Sacks initially says “forces” then admits to voluntary snuggling? He willfully misrepresented the description of an event and adjusts it to put him in the best possible light. Hmmm, what other folks willfully misrepresent situations like this? Answer: ABUSERS!!!

Kids Don’t Need Dads Like Glenn Sacks
Sacks: “Listen, then tell me again how kids don’t need their dads… When I went to Boston last month I was gone a total of five days. What would it be like for the 10-year-old girl who left these two messages to be allowed only a few days a month with her dad permanently? Yet our opponents have successfully fought for that to be the norm, and this is what happens in most of the cases I see. To listen, click here. Then tell me again how kids don't need their dads.”29

“Hi Daddy it’s me. I just want to say that I love you and I miss you a lot (sobbing) Bye.”
Next call. “Hi Daddy it’s me I’m calling from Grandmas and Grandpas… you are probably in the airport right now or in the airplane and I love you and I hope you have a smooth trip and I miss you so much I really do. I miss you. When can you come home? I miss you. Call me back as soon as you get to NY or to LA or Burbank wherever Just call me okay anytime just call me Call Me Love you.”

Of course she sounds like a darling little girl. The problem is that she is already 11 years-old at the time of this recording! You can tell by the urgency in this child’s voice that Glenn Sacks isn’t doing his daughter any favors by making her so dependent on him. This over enmeshment only strokes Sacks ego but is emotionally crippling his daughter. Since she is so insecure and overly dependent on her father someone should have told that child exactly what her father’s itinerary was. Worse, it’s not hard to imagine his daughter leaving the exact same type of message for her boyfriend 10 years from now.

Making Kids Afraid of Divorce
“Adrian does not have a father. She lives alone with her mother. My daughter and Adrian sometimes have arguments or disputes, and my daughter thinks that some of it is caused because Adrian is envious of my daughter's ‘luck.’”30 Bad luck if you ask me! Who put that idea into Sacks’ daughter’s head that Adrian is jealous because she doesn’t have a dad??? One guess!

“Last night at the end of my eight year-old daughter's dance lesson she spent a few minutes with a group of her little friends. After we got in the car and began driving home she asked ‘Daddy, why are so many of my friends losing their dads?’ I said ‘Ugh--you mean there's more of them since last time?’ She then began reading off the sad list--Daniela, Justine, etc., etc. One of her best friend's parents got divorced a few months ago and the mother took the daughter and moved back to Mexico. The parents of the little girl we had over for a play date on Saturday are getting divorced. A bunch of her other friends' parents have broken up, and it makes my daughter very nervous. She said ‘I'm not ever going to lose you, am I daddy?’ I reached back and held her hand and said ‘no.’ She said ‘You'll never get divorced?’ I said ‘no.’ She said ‘you promise?’ I said ‘yes. She seemed somewhat relieved, and said ‘that's good. My friends start out with two parents until they get divorced and then they sometimes only have one.’ Ouch.” 31

Why would this child be so worried about her parents getting a divorce unless she is witnessing the problems first hand at home? And how tragically sad for Mrs. Sacks: divorce has officially been declared as not an option for her period! The Master has spoken! Another “teachable moment” flying out of the car window this time. This would have been a great opportunity for Mr. Sacks to teach his daughter about “the facts of life” – helping her to see that divorce, while sad, as a healthy and appropriate option for people who just don’t get along anymore – that it’s certainly nothing to be afraid of. Instead, he promises his daughter something he truly cannot guarantee: him and his wife not getting divorced – after all, Mrs. Sacks still legally has the right to file for and obtain a divorce if she so chooses. The part where Mr. Sacks promises no, you can’t lose me is genuinely accurate because if Mrs. Sacks ever filed for divorce and custody, these children WOULD most likely lose their MOTHER NOT their father.

How can Sacks be so sure that his wife will never divorce him? – Oh yeah… because he has already threatened her that he will get custody. “the California Supreme Court support granting primary custody to the children's primary caregiver (that's me), and contend that custodial parents should have the presumptive right to move as stated by the Court in its 1996 decision.” 32

He has also made these veiled threats public on more than one occasion: “My wife is a successful career woman. She has moved up rapidly in a competitive field, and is advancing her career by attending law school at night. I work out of our home and I do most of the child care. If I decide I don't want her anymore, should I be able to move our kids 2,400 miles away from their mother?”33

No Need for a Protest To Protect Girls
I can’t believe how Glenn Sacks starts a major campaign protesting the “boys are stupid” t-shirt but he makes light of degrading hip hop music that both of his kids listen to!

“Perhaps emblematic of modern rap/hip-hop was a love song in which the refrain is a man telling his girlfriend "You're the fuckin' best." You get the feeling that the couple's most romantic moment is when he looks into her eyes and says, "You're so special I only banged two other chicks this week" as she has tears of affection and gratitude in her eyes.”34

“I've at times been surprised and dismayed at the way the trend towards women dressing in skimpy clothes has filtered down to young girls. I think it's a trend our daughters can do without.”35

“I’m not looking forward to my 10-year-old daughter spending the next God knows how many years comparing herself to these images and then feeling inferior. That’s false, of course–she already is comparing herself to those images, but I’m in denial about it, kidding myself that she’s still “a baby” and not influenced by these things.”36

Wake up Glenn! She was already 10 years-old when you wrote this article and definitely not a baby! It looks like her inferiority complexes will originate from her Oedipal father. If Sacks is indeed worried about his daughter’s self-image why in the world didn’t he launch a protest against the “Hooters in training” t-shirt?37 Instead of taking a stand against sexism for his own daughter’s benefit, he posted it on his site in jest!

Inappropriate Parent-Child Boundaries Abound
“The other day my wife handed me a note that was in our mailbox that said that someone was interested in buying our home and asked us to call the real estate agent for an offer. Moving is the last thing we feel like doing right now, but my wife and I discussed how much it would take for it to be worth it. My nine-year-old daughter, normally a very happy little girl, listened to this for a minute or two and then burst out crying. She kept saying, ‘This is my home, I don't want to leave’" She loves our house, but obviously it symbolizes far more for her--her happy family, her happy life, her comfort and protection, her home. I hadn't seen her so distraught in quite a while. I took the letter away from my wife, handed it to my daughter and said ‘Here, tear it up and throw it in the trash, we're not moving anywhere’ She did it, and then sat in my arms and sobbed for another five minutes.

I'm certainly not going to say that the average kid is going to react like this--families move all the time and it's no big deal. Still, I couldn't help but wondering if she and other kids like her react like this to a comparatively minor change, how would they react to a divorce? And how traumatic is it for the average nine-year-old to have his or her home torn apart by a divorce?
Everybody always says, ‘Oh, kids are resilient, they'll get over it.’ Maybe, or maybe not.”38

Do you notice that HE TAKES the letter from his wife? HE hands it to his daughter and HE tells her to rip it up? Again, leaving Mrs. Sacks as nothing more then a silenced second-class citizen in the Glenn Sacks kingdom. The reason why adult issues are kept away from children is because they don't have the maturity, wisdom or inner strength to be exposed to such issues – all they’re supposed to know is what’s in their little worlds where they’re supposed to feel safe, protected, loved and nurtured. The worries and issues of the adult world are supposed to be actively kept from them so they can grow up unencumbered by them – appropriate parent-child boundaries accomplish this goal – just not in the Sacks household.

Puppet Child
“We live on a one acre lot, part of which used to be used for horses, so when my nine-year-old daughter is playing outside and I want to check on her, it can be a little time-consuming. For years and years we've had a shouted, long-distance dialogue that always goes exactly like this:

Me: ‘Sweetheart?’
My daughter: ‘Yes?’
Me: ‘Love you’
My daughter: ‘Love you’

For the past few weeks, however, the last line of that four- line exchange has been missing. Sometimes I spend an extra few moments waiting for it. Now I've started to give up and not wait. Instead I walk away telling myself, ‘Come on, you knew she had to outgrow that, you knew it, you knew it...’”40 Once again, it’s all about what Glenn wants not what his children need.
Over Enmeshed
“As a parent, have you had the following experience? The other day we were riding our bikes together and stopped at a pretty, grassy place surrounded by trees. Watching her I was overcome with my love for her, as I often am. I called her over and tried to explain how special times like these are for me, how lucky we are to have each other and to have had these 10 years together. She hugs me and says, ‘I love you,’ but there's a part of me that wishes that for five minutes I could be talking to the adult version of my daughter. The 40-year-old mother who could for that moment understand how I felt as a parent, instead of how my daughter feels as a child.”40

I have to say as a daughter, I’m particularly grossed out by this passage and if I were Mrs. Sacks, I’d be seriously concerned about my husband’s waves of “overcoming love” for our daughter. The only time Mr. Sacks talks about his wife is when he’s referring to income or demonstrating his superiority over her – shouldn’t there be volumes of pages gushing of Glenn’s undying love for his wife, the mother of his children? Without her, he wouldn’t have had ANYTHING in his life: no children, no home, no income, no standing – where’s the respect, honor, love and devotion she rightfully deserves? Instead the subject of all this gushing love is directed at his daughter AND he’s fantasizing about her as a 40 year-old who (once again!) is putting HIS needs first.

“My wife kids me that I want my girl to be little forever, and she's not completely wrong… But while I'm happy to see her grow, it saddens me to see this special, unique era in our lives slip away. I wish I could somehow save and store the present and take it out once in a while. To preserve this special moment in time when my daughter is – happily, proudly and completely – daddy's little girl.”41 Even a tender moment can be ruined by Sack’s ownership of his children.

Humiliating Pregnant Teen
“Just got back from spending several days at my sister-in-law's house in Nevada. Pictured above are my son (age 16), my niece (17)… In February I'm going to become a great uncle, which I'm having a hard time getting used to. The only thing worse is becoming a grandfather… It's not great timing, to say the least, but my niece and her boyfriend both seem to be stepping up and taking their new responsibilities very seriously. My wife and I have our fingers crossed. Here's a question I wonder if anybody knows the answer to--of teens who have a child together at/around age 18 and are a couple at the time of the child's birth, how many of them are still together 10 years later? How many are still together 25 years later? If anybody has any stats on it, I'd be interested.”42

I can’t believe that ‘Uncle Glenn’ publically shames this 17 year-old girl by publishing a picture of this minor on his men’s advocacy site! Why in the world would Glenn Sacks exploit this 17 year-old girl who is in a clearly difficult situation? In her interview on Oprah, Sara Palin spoke about the pain of others outing her daughter, Bristol’s pregnancy. Both mom and daughter wanted to handle the disclosure their way as they should rightfully have been allowed to do, just as Mr. Sacks’ niece should have been allowed to do IF she chose to announce it to the world at all.

“My niece and her boyfriend seem to be in love, he works hard and seems to do his best to be caring and supportive, and she seems to appreciate him. Still, looking at them one sees the absolute absurdity of the idea--shared by Obama, Dan Quayle, the responsible fatherhood movement, the feminist movement, traditional women, and chivalrous men alike--that if they split up, it's because he "didn't live up to his responsibilities" or "abandoned" his child and the child's mother. The fate of this fragile young couple lies at least as much with my niece and her choices as with her boyfriend and his choices, perhaps more”43

Oh my word… he has already taken the boyfriend’s side if they break up! Blood may be thicker than water but it looks like testosterone is thicker than blood when Glenn Sacks is involved.

“One can already see how the system undermines the teen father right from the beginning. She'll go on welfare and he'll have his wages garnished to help pay for it. Thus instead of him being able to spend that money on his baby or on her or do little things to make her happy or grateful or things to help them move up in the world, the money will be going to the government. The pittance the government will get from him now pales in comparison to the overall social costs of them splitting up. It would be far better if he were allowed to use all of his meager resources to take care of his new family and keep his child's mother happy.”44

Wow, congratulations on your pregnancy and for the life you’re about to embark on. I really don’t understand how Sacks has it so backwards. Father’s who pay child support aren’t just randomly paying the government. The money goes to the children! But instead of having children without food and clothing when fathers decide not to contribute to their children’s living expenses, the government gives the mother an advance for the children. Get it Glenn? It is basically a short term loan! They government collects the child support money from the father. Welfare paid from the government is to cover the difference between the child support and the predetermined cost of living.

A month later Sacks has a whole article dedicated to “Naming My Grandnephew” Why can’t he support this pregnant teenager without exploiting her? Now his niece won’t have the ability to name her own child too?

“I just found out that my niece's baby is going to be a boy. The mother is the girl with me in the photo. If you say she looks too young to have a kid, you'd be right. If you say I look too young to be (gulp) a granduncle, you wouldn't be right, but you would be kind.”45

Those Who Live In Glass Houses
Considering what Mr. Sacks has said about me and my family without even the slightest bit of provocation on any of our parts, that saying “Those who lives in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones” keeps coming to mind as I learn more about Mr. Sacks.

From what I see looking into Mr. Sacks’ glass house, Mr. Sacks actively contributes to the very problems he complains about and is completely oblivious to the harm he’s deliberately caused and subjected his own children to! His son makes his feelings known yet Mr. Sacks continues to make this all about him so misses the point, instead using his son’s words as an opportunity to exemplify “what a good dad he is to such a troubled boy”.

And what he’s done to his daughter! Sadly for her, the consequences are yet to come but they’ll be seen in her future relationships with men, her boyfriends and husband. When we all get to see the results of Glenn’s “fine parenting” I wonder who he’ll blame it on? Probably their “absent mother” who was “completely unavailable” to her own children because she was out “enjoying her career”.

When I first began my investigation into Mr. Sacks, I thought I’d find some picture-perfect Norman Rockwell family, but at this point, Mrs. Sacks truly has my sympathy and empathy as do the Sacks children. THIS is the man who’s representing fathers? I think a better spokesman is sorely needed.

Index
1 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2554
2 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2554
3 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=207
4 06/15/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
5 http://www.hisside.com/10_19_03.htm
6 06/17/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2316
7 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2316
805/22/02 www.glennsacks.com/stayathome.htm
9 07/04/08 http://www.fathersandfamilies.org/?cat=35&paged=2
10 09/12/04http://www.glennsacks.com/start_of_school.htm
11 www.canadiancrc.com/Newspaper_Articles/Edmonton_Journal_Boys_stink_06FEB04.aspx
12 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boys_are_stupid,_throw_rocks_at_them!_controversy
13 http://www.post-gazette.com/columnists/20040131roddysatcolp1.asp
14 10/10/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1259
15 01/19/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=112
16 03/05/09 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3431
17 12/17/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1554
18 03/05/09 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3431
19 02/14/09 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3345
20 12/17/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1554
2106/15/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
22 06/15/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
23 06/15/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
24 01/10/02 http://www.glennsacks.com/the_price_of.htm
25 01/10/02 http://www.glennsacks.com/the_price_of.htm
26 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3777
27 01/10/02 http://www.glennsacks.com/the_price_of.htm
28 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2986
29 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=3589
30 08/07/08 http://mensnewsdaily.com/glennsacks/2008/08/07/remember-girls-dont-need-dads/
31 01/30/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=159
32 02/23/04 http://www.glennsacks.com/california_NOW_takes.htm
33 06/29/07 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=845 at 5:05 pm
34 09/07/09http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4187
35 01/07/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1650
36 01/07/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1650
37 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1650
38 01/17/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1631
39 01/03/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=1632
40 05/16/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
41 06/15/08 http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=2309
42 09/07/09http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4187
43 09/07/09http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4187
44 09/07/09http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4187
45 10/03/09http://glennsacks.com/blog/?p=4255