I am proud of you all!!! You are very brave!!!... The same thing happened to us 1990-1994. The judge "punished" me… when I fell behind on the mortgage payments during the divorce. I was a stay at home Mom and my (daughter) was also pried away from me. Our abuser kept saying I was interfering with his rights as a parent over and over and could never prove that, but he said it so many times it became record and they gave him custody.
I watched your mom after the hearing and I could see the PTSD in her. I have it too. Just going to the government center or thinking about it makes me sick and it is hard not to shake. So many bad memories of trying to fight for my kids there and always getting abused by the system. You are right how can it be legal for an abuser to get custody. If a woman has an order for protection, how can she cooperate with visitation.
My husbands lawyer made mincemeat of any and everyone who tried to help or intervene. My ex felt so powerful to always see me cry in court and then would say "see she is mentally unstable". He had tape recordings of me crying for his pleasure...
God Bless you as you try to recover and I think it is so sad that now that the truth is out your father is not charged with a crime, but you mom has to do community service instead of receiving an apology and an award. I wish you success in your endeavors to fight on I know your Mom is tired and I know how we all long for justice, but fear seeking it now. I wish that Hennepin Co. could be sued for the lives it has ruined.